


I Need-

by Howlingdawn



Category: Stumptown (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Spoilers, Stumptown Spoilers, at least not beyond sleeping together as per canon, but still, i love them, it's 2am and i need sleep but i have a new otp, they're not together in this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-09-27
Packaged: 2020-10-29 04:14:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20790449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Howlingdawn/pseuds/Howlingdawn
Summary: Dex can only run from the PTSD for so long. When an explosion triggers a severe panic attack, Miles is there to catch her when she falls.





	I Need-

**Author's Note:**

> I watched the premiere a few hours ago aND HOLY CRAP WAS IT WORTH THE WAIT. THESE TWO!!! I'm in LOVE. She's fast-paced with PTSD and he's calm and steady with a soothing voice they're pErFeCt. I know it's based on some comics so idk if they have a ship name from that but I've been calling them Hex (for all of. like. 4 hours. but anyway.) and I just l o v e t h e m

Miles pulled up to the smoldering wreckage at reckless speeds, lights flashing and siren blaring. The warehouse where Dex had gone undercover with Officer Briggs was all but obliterated, still crawling with firefighters, debris scattered across the field. He skidded to a halt by the swarm of emergency vehicles, splattering the nearest ones with mud, clutching the wheel in a death grip.

_Control yourself, Hoffman. You’ll do no one any good panicking._

He wanted nothing more than to throw the door open and run, praying he wouldn’t find her charred body being zipped into a bag, but he forced himself to pause. He switched off his siren and lights, taking deep, steady breaths all the while. In. Out. In. Out. Until the thundering of his heart had quieted to a volume he was certain other people wouldn’t be able to hear.

Only then did he get out, closing the door normally, like he wasn’t a man who didn’t know if the woman who had become his closest friend was alive or dead or worse. He picked his way through the mud, doing his best to find drier patches of ground, focusing on that as the scene unfolded before him.

Paramedics were zipping bodies into bags. Three of them, to be precise, and he knew there had been four people in the warehouse: Two drug dealers, Briggs, and Dex. Otherwise the building had been abandoned, rotting out in the middle of nowhere. Nowhere for cops to hide nearby, which was why it had taken Miles far too long to get to the scene when the call came over the radio.

He shook off the memory of the sheer terror he’d felt when he finally spotted her. Dex was pacing, twisting her hands together. “Dex!” he called, walking towards her.

She didn’t respond. As he neared, he saw how white her skin was where she rubbed it, heard her mumbling under her breath, saw the distant, panicked look in her eyes. _Damn._

A paramedic was trying futilely to catch her, and Miles waved him off. He softened his voice, not to a level she might find condescending, but enough to soothe. “Dex?”

Now she noticed him. She spun around, losing her balance in the mud, and he grabbed her elbow to steady her. Blood stained her forehead, her hands and clothes coated in dried mud. “Miles,” she said, fixing her wide eyes on him, and the use of his first name made his heart spasm with concern.

“What happened?” he asked, squeezing her elbow, trying to silently communicate that he was there for her.

She just pulled out of his grip, resuming pacing back and forth. “We- we were making the deal,” she stammered, gesturing wildly, and he saw her hand shaking. “It was going _fine_\- or, well, as fine as making a drug deal goes- and then I-I guess Briggs said something- or maybe I did- but they pulled their guns- and I didn’t- I didn’t smell the gas until it was too late- and then I ran- I-I thought Briggs was with me- but I turned around and- and- and-”

“Hey,” he said gently, taking her hands into his, “it’s not your fault-”

“No!” she all but screamed, yanking her hands out of his grip. She spun around, pushing her hair back from her forehead, staining her palm with blood. “No, I don’t- I don’t need to be- to be comforted- I know it wasn’t my fault- do I? Yes. No. I- I don’t-”

It wasn’t just her hand shaking now. Her whole body trembled, her breaths coming in gasps, tears cutting tracks down her dirty cheeks. “It wasn’t Ben,” she rasped. “But it- was it? I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t _know_!”

Her last word was a desperate wail. Fingers fisting in her hair, she started to fall, started to sink to her knees.

Miles caught her around the waist before she could hit the ground, pulling her back to her feet. “Hey, hey, take it easy, don’t hurt yourself,” he said, trying to work her fingers loose from her hair as carefully as he could.

She refocused on him suddenly, as if he had just materialized in her arms. “Miles,” she said again, a wild smile on her lips. She grabbed the back of his head, yanking him down for a rough kiss.

“No,” he said, pushing her off. “Not like this.”

Her panic turned to rage, punching his chest, trying to push away or pull him back, he couldn’t quite tell. “Damn it, Hoffman, I need this!”

“No, you don’t,” he said firmly, holding her wrists tightly. “Just take a breath, ok? Just take a breath, please, let the paramedics look at you, and I’ll call Grey-”

“No!” she yelled, still fighting him, hands flat against his chest. “I don’t need Grey, I don’t need you, I just- I just need-”

The fight left her in an instant, exhaustion making her crumple. He caught her, her hands curling into fists, clutching fistfuls of his shirt. “I need _Ben_,” she sobbed, burying her face in his chest. “I need Ben!”

Miles held her up with an arm around her waist, his other hand cupping the back of her head, stroking her hair. “I know,” he murmured, tucking her beneath his chin. “I know, Dex.”

“I tried to save him,” she cried, her voice hoarse. “I tried _so hard_, but he was just- he was just _gone_\- and I- I-”

“Shh,” he soothed, just holding her, tucking her securely against his warmth. “Just let it out, Dex. I’ve got you. I’ve got you.”

Her blood was staining his shirt, but he didn’t care. She cried the tears she had held in for so long, grief and pain and so much more pouring out in rivers beneath the clouded sky, and Miles just held her, supported her through it, standing in the icy mud and smoking wreckage and not giving a damn about anything but the broken woman in his arms.

“I’ve got you, Dex. I’m here.”

For the first time, he felt like she actually heard him.

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah I had mixed feelings about not getting to see Miles rescue her in the pilot, cause like YAS she's badass I love her, but also s h i p, so I whipped this out real quick. Hope you liked it!


End file.
